Teen Praised For Secretly Deleting Picture From Dad's Phone: 'Consent'

An 18-year-old man has been praised for breaking into his dad's phone and deleting a photograph of himself.

In a post on Reddit's popular r/AmITheA****** sub, the young man explained that he had been on vacation with his family and friends.

They had been enjoying their break until an argument erupted over a photograph taken at the beach.

The man explained: "I don't like shirtless pictures of me being taken."

"I specifically said, 'no photos at the beach,' and they agreed to this," added the 18-year-old. "It has been a fact for years that I don't like my photo being taken. So it's nothing new."

Family and beach and man with phone
A file photo of a family walking on the beach, left, and a picture of a young man looking at a phone upset, shocked, right. The internet has praised a teenager for deleting a picture... Chainarong Prasertthai/Image Source/Getty Images

Generally, the group respected this and no pictures were taken, but one day at the beach he went into the sea without his top on and things took a turn.

"I'm swimming and my dad takes pictures of me without my consent," he said. "I shake my head, put my arms up and tell him to stop but he continues and smiles while doing so."

How we take and share pictures of children online is often a topic of debate, with some parents even banning other family members from sharing pictures of their kids.

When the Redditor got out of the water, he confronted his father about the picture: "'Why did you do that, I specifically asked you not to?'" he asked his dad. "Then he goes on the defensive, [he said] 'You're my son, I can take pictures of you if I want.'"

Enas Daeki, a published author and relationship coach, was forthright when telling Newsweek her views on the story. "The son is absolutely in the right, for several reasons. He made it perfectly clear that he did not want his shirtless picture taken. Perhaps there is an insecurity that he has harbored for a while, or perhaps it's a privacy thing, regardless, he made it clear, to the entire family—and it takes courage to do something like that."

Daeki explained that regardless of the reasoning, the 18-year-old is within his rights to expect his family to respect those boundaries—regardless of whether or not they agree with them.

"Dad was absolutely in the wrong when he disregarded his son's wishes, and, worse still, smiles about it. That fact that he pulls the 'I'm your father' card makes things so much worse. A father does not have the right, legal or moral, to just blatantly disregard his child's wishes," added Daeki.

After the picture had been taken, the poster was feeling uncomfortable and took matters into his own hands, sneaking into his dad's phone to delete the pictures.

But when his dad found out what he had done, he was furious.

Despite his father's anger, the son stood by his decision, explaining: "I understand that he wanted to take a picture of me to commemorate the time at the beach and that's cool... but he did the one thing I asked him not to."

"Yes, the son broke the father's trust by deleting the picture from his father's phone," said Daeki. "But he honestly bought that on himself. His son merely mirrored his own actions—the father should know better."

The poster admitted he knew it was wrong, but was determined to delete the picture: "I know changing/accessing things on people's phone is not cool, but I know he wasn't going to delete the pics," he said.

In the comments on the viral Reddit post, people backed the teen for his actions.

One commenter said: "NTA. I have a daughter in elementary school. I ALWAYS ask her if I can take her picture before I do it."

Another replied: "That's a violation of your privacy and you did what you had to do. I grew up with a parent like that and it caused a lot of damage. I'm sorry he treats you that way."

"Ultimately, as upset as both parties must feel, it presents an opportunity for father and son to deepen their bond by being authentic about their feelings, creating new boundaries, and promising to honor one another's communication," said Daeki.

Newsweek has reached out to the poster u/Old_Vegetable9548 for comment. Newsweek was not able to verify the details of this case.

If you have a family dilemma, let us know via life@newsweek.com. We can ask experts for advice, and your story could be featured on Newsweek.

Uncommon Knowledge

Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.

Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.

About the writer


Alice Gibbs is a Newsweek Senior Internet Trends & Culture Reporter based in the U.K. For the last two years ... Read more

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