Man Pulling Stepdaughter's Tuition Because She Wants to Be a Doctor Backed

Members of a popular internet forum rallied behind one man who refuses to make another college tuition payment for his stepdaughter, despite her desperation to become a doctor.

In a viral Reddit post published on r/AmITheA******, Redditor u/Material-Economy2823 (otherwise referred to as the original poster, or OP) said he'd be happy to keep paying if his stepdaughter changes academic direction, but revealed why that's unlikely to happen.

Titled, "[Am I the a******] for not paying for my stepdaughter's tuition because she wants to be a doctor?" the post has received nearly 7,000 upvotes and 3,000 comments in the last day.

"My wife and I have been married for a decade," OP began. "She has a daughter from a previous relationship (Sarah) and we've gotten along for the most part."

Continuing to explain that his stepdaughter has long dreamed of becoming a doctor and helping people, the OP admitted that she's "not a very good student" and said she has struggled with many of the college courses she'll need to enter medical school.

The original poster also said that after a bit of research, he decided to confront both his wife and stepdaughter and propose a change in direction.

"With Sarah's grades, she's not getting into any medical school," OP wrote. "I talked with my wife and she said medical schools look at other things besides grades and that's where Sarah excels.

"I argued none of that matters if her grades are not good enough," OP continued. "I talked with Sarah when she came home for Thanksgiving and told her to look into another major because she might not be cut out to be a doctor.

"We all got into a huge argument. I admit I lost my temper and yelled I'm not wasting any more money on something she'll fail at," OP added. "I told them both I'm not paying for next semester's classes unless she changes her major to something more realistic."

It's no secret that college is expensive.

The cost of a four-year degree has doubled over the last two decades, and according to Education Data, the average cost for a single year of college in the U.S. is nearly $36,000.

But considering out-of-state tuition rates, student loan interest, housing costs and other expenses, Education Data also reports that the final cost for a bachelor's degree can exceed $500,000.

Tack on an average of $218,792 for medical school, and hopeful doctors across the country are faced with a final price tag approaching $1 million.

For many parents, covering or contributing to such high education costs is unrealistic, and in scenarios like the one described by the original poster, can be cause for concern, especially when a child is struggling to achieve their desired goals.

However, conversations about a possible change of major can be difficult, and according to student career consultant Kristin Clark, should be initiated by the student.

"We've got these kids going to college, and they have expectations for what their life is going to look like," Clark told Newsweek. "Parents need to be cautious about ... how they're directing their child for that.

"Because if it's something that the parent is thinking ... they're not the ones that have to do this for the next 30 or 40 years of their life," she added.

Because parental conversations surrounding a child's academic and career choices are often quick to spark conflict, Clark also told Newsweek that discussions should be held long before college classes begin, to set clear expectations for the years ahead.

"One of the things that I think is really important is that parents have this conversation before kids go off to college," Clark said. "Especially when the parent is paying.

"It's better to do that now versus later," she added. "And I think the responsibility falls on both the parent and the child to make those decisions based on facts."

Throughout the comment section of the viral Reddit post, many Redditors echoed that sentiment and warned that the facts might be stacked against the original poster's stepdaughter.

"Medical schools are very competitive and everyone of them have a minimum GPA requirement," Redditor u/nonamenonumber4378 wrote in the post's top comment, which has received nearly 19,000 upvotes. "If her GPA is below that, they'll automatically reject her without the chance of an interview.

"I understand the people saying you should give her a semester to improve but they don't understand how science and math work," they added. "The more advance science and math classes are built upon what should have been learnt in the lower level classes."

Redditor u/Prestigious_Isopod72, whose comment has received more than 6,000 upvotes, offered a similar response.

"[Her] mom is being a '100 [percent] supportive no matter what' parent, but that is not always the most helpful," they wrote. "Someone needs to be objective since the family is not wealthy enough to fund multiple college degrees."

"Sometimes being a good parent is putting a stop to madness and saying no even though it's hard," Redditor u/MilkyPsyCow chimed in, receiving more than 1,000 upvotes. "It's her future so you can't make the decision for her, but you do control the money.

"Perhaps look at other ways to help guide her instead of forcing what you think is best," they added. "Help her see what you already see."

Newsweek has reached out to u/Material-Economy2823 for comment. We could not verify the details of the case.