College Grad Reveals the 6 Shocking Secrets Behind Sorority Houses

From Legally Blonde to Scream Queens and Sydney White, there's a certain allure to sorority life.

Charmed by the promise of socials and sisterhood—along with career-boosting networking opportunities—an estimated 750,000 students are members of a fraternity or sorority in the U.S.

However, sororities also have a controversial reputation. They have been associated with binge drinking, bullying and sexual assault—along with accusations of supporting structural racism, elitism, sexism and homophobia.

Pop culture hasn't always been kind to sorority girls and, although there are exceptions, if film and TV doesn't portray sorority members as rowdy party animals or vacuous bimbos, then they're usually murder victims or the focus of sexploitation films.

Becca Moore attended Ohio University from 2016 to 2020. As a freshman, all of the girls in her dorm were desperate to join a sorority, despite their divisive reputation. Intrigued, Moore pledged and was accepted, but didn't know quite what she was getting into (Newsweek has reached out to Ohio University for comment).

Sharing her experiences on her TikTok account (@Becccamooore) on December 1, her tell-all video went viral, receiving almost 5 million views.

"There's a lot of drama in the house," she explains. "You don't have privacy, you don't feel like an adult in your own house."

Newsweek asked Moore to share the secrets of sorority life, and she was more than happy to spill.

Sorority Secret 1: It's Not Like the Movies

When she decided to rush for a sorority, Moore had a very specific image in her head gleaned from pop culture. She was not expecting the strict rules—some of which were more than 100 years old—or that she would have to dedicate her college life to making the sorority "look good."

"It was very much about image," she told Newsweek. "Right from the recruitment stage, it was a cutthroat process."

Fortunately, Moore was not subjected to the intense hazing portrayed in film and TV shows. Instead, her introduction involved downing copious numbers of shots.

"It was OK, because I wanted to drink the shot anyway," she said. "But for the boys it was pretty bad. Like, they'd be locked in their frat house for a week with no food and only alcohol."

Still, Moore found the initiation process for new members bizarre. A week before the event, current sorority sisters had to make themselves "pure." This included no smoking, drinking or junk food, and no make-up (even nail polish).

On the day of the initiation, sisters had to wear white robes and attend a "religious ceremony," where new members pledged their allegiance.

"It's weird. It's like you do this ceremony and all of a sudden, this girl is part of a cult," she said.

Sorority Secret 2: You're More Likely To Get In if You're Pretty and Rich

According to Moore, the ideal candidate for her sorority was wealthy, sociable and adhered to societal beauty standards.

Girls were chosen based on their looks as much as their personality, and were not allowed to wear the sorority's branding or colors unless they were "presentable."

Photo shoots would include the most attractive girls, while "less attractive" members would be given the low-tier jobs at events.

Although not an official thing, Moore said there are plenty of local forums dedicated to ranking sororities based on members' appearances. Moore's sorority was considered "mid-tier," but the ranking changed every year.

"It's shallow, it's based on the hottest girls," she said. "Sororities and frats won't openly admit it exists, but it does."

As her family wasn't wealthy, Moore was constantly in debt to the sorority, and was often threatened with repossession.

According to data collated by Bankrate, the average cost of being in a sorority is between $300 and $600 a semester. This doesn't include room and board expenses of living in a sorority house, which cost between $1,000 and $7,000 a term.

There are also ad hoc additional charges, with members contributing to event and social costs.

"I didn't realize how expensive it would be," she said. "It's crazy."

Sorority Secret 3: Members Are Watched Constantly

As well as the costs, Moore struggled to follow the rules. Some of these directives, such as no drinking or smoking, date back to the sorority's founding in the 1800s, while others were created more recently for the social media era.

Even a photo of her partying on Facebook was enough to get her reprimanded, as was dressing in a manner deemed too "risque."

"We weren't allowed to post or be seen in pictures with red solo cups," she said. "Imagine being 21 and not being able to have a glass of wine."

Sororities also have a "house mother," who supervises the members to make sure they're following the rules.

"I think she thought she was our actual mom," Moore said. "One time, she tried to take away our TV as a punishment.

"Another time, we didn't wash our dishes fast enough, so she took all of our cups away for a month. We were drinking out of water bottles."

The house mother would sit with the members at mealtimes, listening in to their conversations to check there were no boys in the house or that the rules were being adhered to.

The house mother also worked with the sorority president to oversee the members, along with a board of six "executives." These executives would listen out for possible infractions and would inform the president, but they also had a team of close friends acting as spies on their behalf.

"No matter how weird the rules got, you could never complain to each other, because you didn't know who was on your side or the exec's side," she said.

As well as backstabbing, there were non-stop power struggles. Moore was pressured into skipping "non-approved" events, with the sorority heads calling an executive meeting after she attended a frat party without their consent.

"Another time, myself and some other girls were getting ready to go to a party and other members sat outside the door of our room taunting us," she said.

Although there was a lot of infighting, there was actually very little the executives or the president could do to punish Moore, other than publicly shame her or ban her from sorority events.

As a result, Moore was a proud rule breaker, which riled the executives further and gave her a bad reputation within the sorority.

Sorority Secret 4: You Can't Always Trust Your Sorority Sisters

Although sororities sell themselves as a supportive community of like-minded individuals, Moore said Greek life can be pretty ruthless.

"It's not real friendship," she said. "You can't just put the best-looking people in a room together and expect them to be best friends, that's not how it works. People hated each other."

The sorority also influenced Moore's social life, particularly with other groups on campus.

"There were frats that you were supposed to associate with, and you couldn't be seen as favoring one over another," she said. "We weren't even allowed to have group chats with them on WhatsApp."

However, Moore did make some real friends while in the sorority, and she did have some fun times while living in the house.

"But that's only because I found a bunch of people who were on my side," she said.

Sorority Secret 5: It's Super Conservative

Every two weeks, Moore's sorority would throw "date parties"—essentially a scheduled dance arranged with a frat. However, Moore was banned from attending these events because of a failure to keep up with her rent.

"The whole system is really 1950s, like you wouldn't believe," she said. "But it's much worse in the south than it is in northern states like Ohio.

"I realized pretty quickly that the frats were allowed to do whatever they wanted but the girls were not.

"The girls are held to such high standards, it's insane."

As these date parties were designed with heterosexual members in mind, what about LGBT members? Moore said there was no intention to exclude LGBT people, rather, the sorority just didn't consider that LGBT people would pledge.

"I think they were honestly just ignorant to the fact," Moore said.

Moore has noted fewer people rushing sororities, which she believes is a result of the Greek system's failure to adapt to the times.

"Sororities are not as popular, so every year the number of people rushing was going down," Moore said.

Sorority Secret 6: It's Easier to Bully a Member Into Leaving Than Kick Her Out

At the beginning of her senior year, Moore left the sorority. Although she officially resigned, higher ups had been pressuring her to leave for a long time.

Her disregard for the rules, her refusal to attend house meetings and unpaid membership costs had made her unpopular. She had also been close with the executive that controlled the sorority's finances, but once her friend moved on, the president's patience with Moore ran out.

At this point, she was desperate to leave, but didn't think she could because of the debt. She was already living off-campus with a group of supportive friends, and was relieved to put her time at the sorority behind her.

"When I tell these stories about Greek life, people think I'm exaggerating," Moore said. "They're like, 'no, that can't be real,' but it is."